


Kyle's First Kiss

by antagon1st



Category: South Park
Genre: Fluff, M/M, Mentions of Sex, Sexual Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-17
Updated: 2017-02-17
Packaged: 2018-09-24 13:05:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,681
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9728372
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/antagon1st/pseuds/antagon1st
Summary: Kenny learns that Kyle hasn't had his first kiss yet and offers to help him get it out of the way.





	

**Author's Note:**

> This definitely isn't my best work but I still wanted to post it because it's kinda cute idk  
> I've been writing so much Crenny lately I decided it was time for some K2  
> (even though there's still lowkey some Crenny in this lol. I couldn't help myself.)  
> I tried to post this for Valentine's Day but ao3 was not cooperating

Kyle let out an annoyed sigh as he closed the door to his guidance counselor’s office behind him and began making his way back to his fourth-period class; AP English. He had already missed almost the entire first half of class, thanks to a mixup with his schedule that he’d had to take care of. Somehow he had been switched from AP English to regular tenth grade English, and he almost hadn’t wanted to fix the error, if he was being honest. The four AP classes on his schedule pretty much sucked every last drop of energy out of him on a daily basis, and the idea of being able to slack off in just _one_ class didn’t seem all that bad to him. But he knew that his parents wouldn’t have it, so he had taken it upon himself to fix the problem before it became a bigger one.

He decided to stop in the bathroom before going back to class, since he probably wouldn’t get another chance to later in the day. He made his way to the nearest one and was grossed out but not surprised when he opened the door to find his friend Kenny McCormick with some guy pinned up against the wall and his tongue down his throat.

“Dude, come on, really? Gross.” Kyle spoke up. They broke apart immediately upon becoming aware of his presence and he then recognized the other male as none other than Craig Tucker, someone he hadn’t spoken more than a few words to since they had left elementary school. He hadn’t known that Craig was gay (or whatever he was), so it came as a bit of a shock to him. “Craig?” Kyle spoke again, raising an eyebrow at him.

“I should get back to class,” The taller male mumbled as he pushed past him and began walking towards the door.

“Call me!” Kenny called after him as the bathroom door slammed shut.

Kyle couldn't help but chuckle amusedly at the situation that had just unfolded in front of him. “So,” He cleared his throat awkwardly as his friend attempted to catch his breath. “He’s the guy you’ve been ditching us to hang out with every weekend for the past month?”

“Heh, yeah.” The promiscuous blond chuckled. “He’s been uh, experimenting with his sexuality lately, I guess. But just between you and me he's totally gay as fuck, though.” He elaborated. ‘Hey, do me a favor and don’t tell anyone what you saw, though? He’s probably freakin’ out, I told him nobody really comes in here while class is in session.”

“Don’t worry, dude. What happens in the men's bathroom stays in the men’s bathroom.” Kyle replied, grinning knowingly. This certainly hadn’t been the first time he had walked in on his friend doing something nasty with some guy or some girl. Kenny was always messing around with someone. Kyle was a bit envious, almost, of the way that everybody seemed to want him.    

“So uh, what about you, dude?” Kenny inquired, leaning up against the wall he was standing in front of. Clearly, he had no intention of returning to class like Craig had claimed he was going to.

“What _about_ me?” Kyle asked, raising an eyebrow at his friend.

“You been seeing anyone lately? We haven’t really caught up in a while.” Kenny spoke again.  

“Oh. Uh, no. Not really.” Kyle replied honestly, shaking his head. He wished that he could find the time to be with someone, but with the copious amounts of homework from all of his AP classes and all of the extracurricular activities he was involved in, he could barely find the time to breathe. Not that a ton of people really showed any interest in him in that way, anyway. If they did, he was too preoccupied with school to notice it.

“You fucking anybody?” Kenny asked, a playful smirk on his face.

“What? No!” Kyle replied defensively, taken aback by the rather intrusive question. Though he probably should have expected it from Kenny. “ _No._ ” He repeated, more calmly this time.

“God, you are such a bore.” Kenny teased. “Come on. _Anything?_ ”

Normally, someone trying so relentlessly to get such personal information out of him would piss Kyle off, but Kenny was always like this. He  _loved_ hearing stories about other people's hookups. Always wanted all of the details. It was a bit amusing, actually, the way he got so excited about it. But unfortunately, Kyle didn't have any stories that were worth telling. “Sorry to disappoint you dude, but no. I’ve never even kissed anybody-” He blurted out.

_Ah, fuck._

Kenny’s eyes widened. “No shit dude, really?” He chuckled amusedly. “We’ve been friends since preschool and I had no idea you were still a lip virgin.”

It was true. Kyle had never even come close to kissing anyone, or even going out on a date. Any spare time he had, he spent with his friends, since he didn’t have many classes with them, and didn’t get to tag along when they all hung out together most of the time, due to how busy he always seemed to be.  “Come on, don’t make a big deal about it.” Kyle replied embarrassedly, staring down at his feet. “I wish I could just get it out of the way but I don’t really have time for shit like that, y’know? I’m in four AP classes, and basketball, _and_ I do tutoring on the weekends. It’s a lot of work.”

“Well shit, Ky, I can find somebody who’s willing to kiss you and probably do more. Just give me ‘til the end of the day.” Kenny offered. “There’s plenty of girls around here that are into you. I hear ‘em talk about you all the time.” He winked.

“Really?” Kyle replied, looking back up at Kenny. He was rather surprised to hear this information. “I didn’t think anybody really liked me like that.”

“Oh, totally, dude. You’ve got that whole ‘cute and nerdy’ appeal. Girls love that shit.” Kenny laughed. “You want me to set you up with someone?”

As tempting as the offer was, Kyle wasn’t comfortable with the idea “Oh, no. That’s okay. Call me old-fashioned, but I don’t want my first kiss to be with somebody I barely know. I wanna get it out of the way but I still wanna enjoy it, y’know?” He replied. “Thanks anyway, though. I should _really_ get back to class now. I’ve already missed like, all of this period.” He nodded at his friend and turned to leave but then Kenny spoke up again;

“I’ll do it.”

“What?” Kyle turned to face him again.

“Kiss you.” The blond shrugged. “I’ll do it.”

The redhead had never thought of his friend in that way but he felt his cheeks grow hot at the mention of the idea and he found himself staring down at his feet again to avoid making eye-contact with the taller boy. “Dude, what? No. I’m not… _into_ guys.” He said quietly. It hadn’t sounded very convincing. Kyle had never had a serious crush on another boy, other than a brief crush on his best friend Stan in middle school. But he had dismissed it as just a ‘friend crush’; he had simply confused his deep appreciation for his friend as romantic feelings. That was normal, right?

“I’d believe you a little more if you weren’t blushing so hard.” Kenny said knowingly.

“Fuck you, dude.” Kyle laughed nervously, attempting to keep the conversation casual and mask his obvious embarrassment.

“Hey, man. I’m just tryin’ to be a good friend.” Kenny replied, throwing his hands up defensively. Kyle couldn’t help but suspect that he had other motives, aside from just ‘trying being a good friend.' “You want me to kiss you or not? Nobody’s gotta know about it.” Kenny finished.

“Why are you so set on doing this?” Kyle questioned him. He couldn’t believe that he was actually considering going through with this.

“I don’t know,” The blond responded nonchalantly. “You’re cute and it makes me sad that nobody has ever kissed you.”

Kyle rolled his eyes but he couldn’t hold back the flattered grin that was now forming on his face. Kenny hit on everybody like this, but Kyle wasn’t used to being the one on the receiving end of it of it. “What about Craig?” He asked.

“We’re not exclusive,” Kenny shrugged. “We mostly just fuck-”

“Okay, okay.” Kyle cut him off. “I don’t need the details.”

“What, you jealous?” Kenny teased him.

“ _Anyway,_ ”  Kyle spoke again, ignoring the obviously rhetorical question. “Are you sure you’re okay with…” He trailed off, clearing his throat nervously.

“Kissing you?” Kenny spoke, way louder than necessary. “Hell yeah. Does this mean you’re taking me up on my offer?”

Kyle hesitated before responding, taking a moment to think it over. _Ah, what the hell,_ he thought to himself. _Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad._ Kenny was insanely attractive, he knew that for a fact, and he had no shame in admitting it, even if he wasn’t necessarily into guys. There was always one exception, right? And he was quite flattered that somebody who could have practically whoever he wanted, _when_ ever he wanted, was showing any sort of interest in him. Kenny _wanted_ to kiss Kyle. And even though Kenny wasn’t someone that he had ever been romantically interested in, it still gave him a major boost in confidence. And Kyle _trusted_ Kenny (though sometimes he found himself questioning whether he really should). He didn’t have time for the whole ‘love’ thing, but Kenny was a close friend and that was pretty much the next best thing, as far as Kyle was concerned. 

“Just think of it as a friend doing another friend a favor.” Kenny added.

“...Yeah. Fine.” Kyle responded, finally. “Just, not here, okay?” They could have just done it right then and there, but the idea of having his first kiss in a school bathroom didn't exactly sit well with Kyle. 

Kenny’s face lit up with excitement and amusement, clearly very proud of himself for convincing Kyle to go along with his idea. “Alright. We’ll do it after school.” He nodded at his friend.

“Your place or mine?” Kyle asked.

“God, you make it sound like we’re fucking.” Kenny smirked. Kyle shot him a look of disapproval and rolled his eyes, clearly not amused. “Anyway," Kenny continued. "yours would probably be better. My house probably isn’t the most… _ideal_  environment for something as memorable as your first kiss.”

“Alright,” Kyle nodded and shrugged casually, though he still felt rather weird and unsure about the situation. “Meet me at my locker after last period and we’ll go?”

“You got it, babe.” Kenny replied flirtatiously, adding a wink for good measure. He stepped away from the wall and closer to Kyle. 

“Hey, hey. None of that." Kyle glared at him, taking a step backward. "This is gonna be a one-time thing, alright?” He scolded, though the sudden shift in Kenny's attitude towards him and the way that he was _flirting_ with him was giving Kyle a weird, fluttery feeling in his chest that he couldn't quite describe. It was kind of annoying, actually. 

“Whatever you say,” Kenny shrugged, a playful grin on his face. “...babe.” He added again.

“God dammit,” Kyle said under his breath as he turned to leave the room. He felt his cheeks grow warm again.

_What was he getting himself into?_

* * *

  
Hours later, they sat awkwardly next to eachother on the edge of Kyle’s bed in his room, the door locked, and Kyle was very obviously attempting to avoid doing what they had come there to do in the first place.

“You uh, want something to drink or something?” Kyle offered nervously, his voice slightly shaky.

“Kyyyyle,” Kenny sang. “I know what you’re doing. Stop tryin’ to put this off.” He placed a hand on Kyle’s shoulder.

“Right,” Kyle sighed, staring down at the ground to avoiding making eye-contact.

“Hey,” Kenny said reassuringly, gently moving his hand to Kyle’s chin and tilting it up so that he was now looking him in the eyes. “Don’t be so nervous.”

Kyle nodded, staring into his friend’s eyes apprehensively. That weird feeling in his chest from earlier returned. There was a brief silence.

“Alright so uh,” Kenny cleared his throat awkwardly. “Here, turn towards me,” He adjusted the shorter male’s body so that he was now facing him. He noticed that Kyle, not surprisingly, was very tense. “You ready?”

"Yeah.”

Kyle’s heart sped up with excitement and anxiety as Kenny placed a hand on his cheek and leaned closer to him and he started to wonder if this was really a good idea. “ _Wait,_ ” He sighed, and Kenny paused, backing away a bit.

“What?”

“I don’t, y’know, know what to... _do_ when you kiss,” Kyle trailed off. He wasn't lying, but mostly he was attempting to stall, though he knew that it was too late for him to get out of this.

“Just close your eyes and do what comes naturally. Don’t think about it too much.” Kenny offered him a reassuring smile. “It’s not difficult, I promise.”

"You'd better not shove your fucking tongue down my throat," Kyle remarked half-jokingly.

"Now _that_ I can't make any promises about," The blond chuckled, though he knew that he didn't plan on ruining his friend's first kiss like that. Kyle shot him a look. "I'm  _joking,_ Ky.  _Relax._ _"_ Kenny assured him before leaning in again. 

They got close enough that Kyle could feel Kenny’s breath on his lips and he was about to close his eyes but then he hesitated again, backing away from Kenny.

“Wait, ”

“Kyle. Stop stallin'.”

“Sorry.”

Kenny leaned in a third time.

_“Wait,”_

“Oh for fuck’s sake, Kyle, come here,” Kenny quickly leaned forward without warning and pressed his lips against the other male’s.

Surprisingly, Kyle didn't pull away. He made some kind of noise in the back of his throat, signifying his shock at the abruptness of the kiss, but he felt himself relax finally as their lips moved together gently. But then a few moments passed and he started to feel that maybe he was enjoying this a little _too_ much, and that made him nervous. If he wasn't questioning his sexuality before, he definitely was now. 

The kiss was soft and innocent, which was much different from what Kenny was used to, but still nice. _Really nice,_ he thought.

When they parted, Kyle could feel that he was blushing uncontrollably and he didn't even bother trying to hide it, knowing that it was pointless. He couldn't stop smiling, either.

“So?” Kenny broke the silence, staring back at his friend eagerly. “How was your first kiss?”

“...I-it was-” Kyle stuttered, dumbfounded. “...it was good,” he finished, laughing nervously. He was rather surprised by his own reaction to the situation. It was just a kiss, after all. He couldn't figure out if the butterflies in his stomach were there because of the kiss itself, or because of who it had been with. He decided not to think about it. “Thanks for, y’know...doing that.” He added awkwardly.

“Any time,” Kenny winked, nudging him playfully, causing Kyle to roll his eyes. But his smile didn't fade. “Any other… _firsts_ you wanna get out of the way while we’re at it?” Kenny added suggestively, placing a hand on Kyle’s thigh. _Classic Kenny,_   Kyle thought to himself. 

“I’m not sleeping with you.” Kyle rolled his eyes yet again, pushing his friend’s hand away. He admired Kenny's boldness, he really did. But it was bound to get him into trouble someday, regardless of how charming he was. 

“Damn.” The blond jokingly sighed in defeat. “It was worth a try.”

Kyle let out another awkward chuckle and then there was a brief, uncomfortable silence.  

“So, uh…” Kyle spoke again. “It's only like four thirty, you wanna hang out and play video games for a while or something?”

Kenny shrugged casually. “Sure, dude, why not?”

And just like that, everything was back to normal. 

_For now, at least._


End file.
